Recently in Random Musings Category

Someone recently asked me what my experience of Durga Pujo is in this country. Which made me want to compare it to my memory of it when I lived in India. Memory is a funny thing. My brain searches it's many nooks and crannies and brings up events that sometimes seem to be from somebody else's life.

I realized that not all of my Pujo memories were happy ones and that some of the negative memories influence my relationship to this season, even today.

The happy memories have to do with food and family and anticipation that this Pujo will be different from previous years. For many years we went to the only Pujo in Bangalore for many years. There are now 15. I got to wear a new outfit for every morning and every evening of the Pujo I went to. By the end of it I had 8 new outfits!

The afternoon bhog (lunch) was a ritual that we all looked forward to, even though it meant standing in line and pushing with crowds to find a seats together. Community folks served up khichuri, tarkari, chatney and mishti from buckets onto sal patta plates. My mom very thoughtfully brought spoons for us so we could sift through the piping hot food though we always ate with our hands. On Dashami it was dinner of dal, pulao and aloor dum that brought the food extravaganza to a grand close. But everyday also brought a steady stream of Bengali snacks--singara, chop and luchi ar cholar dal.

As a child I also looked forward to the one day a year that I was allowed to stay up the whole night. On the night of Nabami, jatra (epic plays) started at 10 pm and was followed by a Bengali movie that went on to the wee hours of the morning. And on at least one Pujo day, the family ritual was to watch the latest Bollywood formula picture.

It was all wonderful but everyday I dreaded going to Pujo. I didn't know a lot of kids there. None of my friends from school were Bengali and I was a shy child. And it was at Pujo, I realize now, that I was first exposed to the ideas of caste and class. There were children (and adults) who were special and I was not one of them. They wore different clothes, hung out with each other in their cliques. They were perfect little cultured Bengali kids who could recite kobita and Tagore and dance like Anonda Shonkar's dance troupe even at that young age and were part of the "in" crowd. Even though I was generally a reasonably well adjusted child at school, I was never comfortable amidst the people I was supposed to have the most in common with.

And Pujo today brings back those memories. In a lot of ways it's not a big deal, Pujo comes only once a year and I have moved on to find Bengalis that I like (I married one!). The situation strikes me though as one that faces Diaspora communities. In Kolkata, Pujo seems like it is for everyone and there are enough people among one's family and friends that one can find one's place in it or hover from one to another or choose to stay invisible. But here (as was the case in Bangalore), we are all thrown together asked to get along because it appears that we all come from the same place. However far you travel and try to bury the roots that you don't want holding you down, these are dug up quickly in places where your last name and where your house is in Kolkata can betray everything about you.

That being said, like a true Bengali, the promise of good food has always helped me overcome these other issues!

December is a tough month.I am always overwhelmed by the fact that another year has passed.

It is colder on my bike--my ears ached in the chilly breeze this morning. I hardly ever ride my bike back anymore--it seems too dark and cold. It is flu season and everyone around me seems sick and it feels like I am always on the verge. To make matters worse, I have to study for the exam--if I can pass it this time, the torture will end. And it becomes really difficult to take great pictures in the gloom of winter.

It is also when I get to go home, to India--yes I live in Berkeley now, that is home. But somehow the annual pigrimage to the motherland always seems like a homecoming. And it always feels too short, too rushed, too quick, too happy and suddenly too sad--when I have to leave.

So in the past month, I have actually had people asking about my blog. And I know A really wants me to write. And I do too. So here I am. It hasn't been quite a year since I stopped blogging but it is never to early ;) to start again.

I could muse further about how putting yourself out there can be really tiring but it can be healing too. In some ways it is a body of work that I often go back to and say--"wow, did I say that?" or "oh my god, did I say that?"

I hope, you, my dear friends will find time in your busy lifes to indulge me and my thoughts....

Last month my blog got a ton of comments, which should have made me happy, except that they were all spam-- deep spam. If you missed seeing them, below are a couple reproduced for your and my amusement. What did I do to deserve this?!

"emistry.com As we shall see, the concept of time has no meaning before the beginning of the universe. This was first pointed out by St. Augustine. When asked: What did God do before he created the universe? Augustine didn't reply: He was preparing Hell for people who asked such questions. Instead, he said that time was a property of the universe that God created, and that time did not exist before the beginning of the universe."

"emistry.com I should think it is possible for reason to partially subvert faith; this would happen if, for example, there were a really good argument from premises evident to reason for the denial of something central to faith. That is what people who urge anti-theistic arguments - the argument from evil, for example - are trying to come up with"

"emistry.com The State is not 'abolished', it withers away."

Sept 3rd-5th: Off to Mammoth Lakes. I can't wait to be in the gorgeous outdoors. And to spend time with Miles, Krisztina, Bryant and K's family. Thanks K for inviting us!

Sept 3rd: One year Wedding Anniversary (anniversary of our civil ceremony). Yeah! It has been a blast so far. I love you A.

Sept 3rd: Mukundan is ONE year old!!! He was a cutie the last time I saw him. We can't make his big birthday celebration but we hope see him soon. I love that we share our wedding date with him.

Sept 5th: Teachers' Day

Sept 5th: Also the last day to donate to Work an Hour.

Sept 5th: Labor Day. Holiday. Yeah!!

I have dance class in the City these days. I usually carpool but this last Sunday, I ended up taking public transportation--BART and then the 38 bus. The 38 bus is the most excrutiating bus ever--stopping at almost every block. On the way back, as the bus trudged along, it caused my mind to wander, aided by my stomach, which had only seen a banana that morning.

I called A to see if maybe he was interested in Thai brunch at the Thai Buddhist Temple in Berkeley. I could see myself probably geting there by 12.30, which would not be too late. But A was too caught up in cleaning the home and wasn't sure that he would be able to make it. Hmm..maybe I should go by myself. That red beef curry and and the taro root fritters are so yummy. But then should I get off at Ashby and then get on BART again so I could get my bike at Downtown Berkeley? I guess I could get off at Downtown and ride my bike to the temple. But I wanted food sooner and having gotten food wanted to be home soon too.

Let's see maybe there are other places that are closer. I could get off the bus at Embarcadero and go to that deli across from the Hyatt that has the yummy falafel and shawarma. The food there was really delicious and cheap when we had stopped there with my parents after going to the Zakhir/ Sachdev concert in the City.

But then there was also Tu Lan. Should I walk over there? But I go there more often then other places, so may be not this time then.

So if I wanted Mediterranean food and wanted to get home quickly, I could go to Truly Mediterranean. It would be on my way home and I could even eat while walking my bike. But A thinks their food is overpriced and not that tasty. It would be worth going in to see their new cool mural though.

I guess I could go to Bongo burger. I have been dying to try their lamb kebab burger.

Or I could go to Top Dog next door and get a cheap fast hot dog that I could also eat on my way home.

If a buger is what I want, then maybe I should go to Oscars. It would be on the way. But then it would be messy and I would have to wait until I got home to eat it.

Hmm...Hello Croissant was also on the way. I have never tried their lunch, maybe I could pick up a piece of lasagna. But I didn't really want lasagna.

I could get my meat and have it too if I went to Gregoire. Their lunch sandwiches are so yummy and more reasonably priced than dinner. But that would mean adding in some waiting time.

I almost get off at Ashby BART. But a friend's message saying that he is going to Viks make me rethink that. I get off at downtown, call the friend, get a voice mail. So I dump the Viks idea.

I almost cross the street to go over to Bongo Burger but turn back halfway.

I am also craving spicy Indian food. So I decide to hold my craving until later that day. A and I are going to a concert at I-house. Maybe I can convince him to go to Nan and Curry after.

I get on my bike and ride home.

p.s We don't end up going to the concert, so no Nan and Curry for me! But aren't I lucky to live in a place that has so many kinds of food in thought's reach?!

North Berkeley Safeway, originally uploaded by anirvan.

There is a Safeway right across the street from our house. It's no Trader Joes but you can't argue with the convenience of having a "grocery store" so close to home. No need to ride the bus or drive or to freak out if there is no milk for breakfast the next morning. We call it our "big fridge". Also the fact that there is so much parking at the Safeway makes street parking on our street really easy.

But what we discovered about this Safeway was that it has the longest lines at the checkout counter that we have ever seen! If we ever go shopping there between 6pm and 10pm there is almost always a wait. It makes sense that people returning from work just like us might stop by to do their shopping. Thought it seems that they are always short of checkers and that is what causes the delay. And yesterday was the limit.

I was craving Indian Chinese food and decided to make it myself. I had decided that the secret ingredient that makes Chinese food Indian Chinese is spring onions and I just had to get some. It is at times like this that shopping at Safeway cannot be postponed to after 10pm. After all what is the point of having the friendly neighborhood "big fridge" then?

So I make my round of the store and having bought my five items approach the check out. It looks reasonable from afar but as I approach the counter I realize that the real line is hidden behind the aisle. The line stretches to 3/4 the width of the store. There are only 2 counters open. The lines are also strategically located so there is icecream on one side and wine on the other side--temptation abounds. As I look at the icecream I in turn crave icecream flavors with chocolate and other things, mango icecream and the yummy strawberry fruitbars that are heaven sent in the warm weather that we have been having recently. But for shame of appearing to succumb to temptation I hold myself back.

Thankfully people in line seem more amused by the whole experience than bitter about it. We find out that three checkers had called in sick that day. After what seems like 20 minutes in line and with secret ingredient in my possession I walk the 2 minutes to our door ready to make magic in the kitchen.

The last couple of weeks have been especially fraught with life altering transit experiences. Well, maybe not quite life altering but definitely worth sharing--if only to reduce the pain! And there will probably be more, thus the creation of a new category for the blog.

One night not too long ago Anirvan and I were on our way back after dinner at a friends house in Emeryville. Now taking bus or BART there is not a simple matter. The Emery-Go-Around works during shopping hours but stops at around 10.15 pm. After that Emeryville feels really far away from home.

So our journey starts:

10.00 pm Leave friends house. It was a fun meal. We start walking, linger and take pictures of cool "under the freeway" sculpture, admiring the shadows cast by them. Life is great!

10.15 pm We are on the street waiting for the #57 bus. We walk a couple of blocks looking for a bus stop but don't find one. In front of our eyes the bus passes us by, even as we wave madly (usually we jump to attract attention--I wonder if that might have worked!). We take the pedestrian overpass/ underpass at Powell and walk to San Pablo to catch the 72. It is quite a long walk. On the way we see this.

10.50 pm On reaching the bus stop we find out from a group of kids hanging out at the bus stop that we had just missed the bus. That means waiting for atleast 20 mins. We pass the Black Muslim bakery and a preacher trying to convert two black and apparently Muslim boys to Christianity in front of the doors of the bakery. We keep walking. We love walking but not so much when we have too many different bags to carry and that book that I am reading and the hardcover that we borrowed from my friend when we didn't know what was to follow that act.

11.15 pm: We wait at the first bus stop with a bench. 5 mins later we see the welcome glowing sign of the bus. We get off on Solano because my big plan is to take the 43 and get dropped off at our doorstep.

11.30 pm And so it happens that we are seated again on a bench waiting for the bus. The neighborhood is less intimidating than the last time sitting on the bench. It is colder now and we are both more tired.

11.45 pm Still waiting for the bus. We start to read the hardcover book I borrowed. That tides us over for a bit. It is getting colder and we are getting more impatient.

12 midnight Still waiting for the bus.

12.05 pm We call a taxi in desperation. I am not sure why we didn't earlier. Maybe it was because we wanted to be really hard core about using public transportation or maybe the cold had affected our brain cells. I think we really wanted to make it all the way using that system--especially after everything we had gone through in trying to use it.

12.15 pm Back at home. Warm and grateful and in disbelief that we had made it back that day--well, technically the next day!

It bothers me to see "RSS" so much in my daily life on the web.

I wish this cool syndication tool could have an acronym different from the name of India's most fundamentalist group--that is invloved in shameful acts at Babri Masjid and Gujarat.

Not to mention its attempts to glorify Hitler and saffronize education.

I am excited about Infrastructure Architecture!

"STEVEN HOLL'S latest building, a water filtration plant shaped like a pipe, covered in stainless steel shingles and set in a field on the outskirts of New Haven, is hard to miss - as long as you know where to look."